3e WHAT MADE ME LOVE HER?
Walter Gropius and the Almaniac.
seem to know a thing or two about that woman.
mean Alma? What do you want to know about her?
you also been one of her victims?
her victims - yes, but not the way you imagine.
you be less enigmatic?
haven't been one of her husband nor - alas - one of her innumerable
what way then have you been her victim?
once visited an orphanage where I had passed my unhappy childhood.
I was chosen to offer her flowers, and she hugged me. Her
magic touch bewitched me. It marked me for life.
on, this can't be true!
is, my dear friend. Ever since that supernatural exquisite
contact I cannot love any other woman.
must hate her guts.
hate her, I love her, I miss her, I dream of her, I make love
to her in my fantasy, I am longing for her, I detest her,
I wish I never met her, I am haunted by her, I collect every
piece of memorabilia that has to do with her, I have in my
possession a serviette - impregnated with her perfume and
carrying the marks of her lipstick - that she dropped in a
restaurant after wiping her lips
has really cast her spell on you.
how! I even went so far as to sneak into a toilet cabin when
she left the closet to join her secret lover in the private
compartment of a wagon lit going from Vienna to Munich to
attend the world premiere of Mahler's 8th symphony.
God! You spied on her when she was betraying Mahler with me!
spied on her when she betrayed Mahler with you, and when she
betrayed you with Kamerer, and when she betrayed you with
Kokoschka, and when she cheated you with Lili leiser, and
when she was disloyal to you again with Werfel - I'm sorry
if it hurts you---
any more. All I feel for her is pity.
can't believe you.
met her incidentally not long ago on some official occasion,
at the inauguration of a contemporary art gallery, I watched
her and I must admit I couldn't understand what I found so
compelling about her in the past.
must have been defending yourself by denying your emotions
wish felt anything. But believe it or not: all I felt was
a strong aesthetic aversion. She was huge, fat, heavy, elephantine,
very unpleasant to look at, I dare say even there was something
vile about the expression of her face.
are unjust. There is a lot of anger in your voice. She must
have caused you a lot of pain. You can't help seeing her only
with the eyes of someone she has let down.
are wrong, my friend. The moment she started her romance with
her plump muffin of a poet---
lost all interest in her.
when you first met her in Tobelbad you fell madly in love
with her. You wrote her blazing love letters, you ran after
her and you hung around her following her from the distance
like a horny tomcat.
true, though I don't understand what it was about her that
intoxicated me so strongly. I knew young women who were much
more beautiful than Alma
there wasn't anyone as pretty as she was.
met women who were much smarter than her -
no one was as smart as she was.
I knew girls who were much more attractive than her ---
no girl was as attractive as Alma
even knew women who were much more exciting lovers than she
no woman was as exciting a lover as Alma
of it now, I simply cannot say what it was that made me fall
in love with her.
friend, if you want to understand what made you fall in love
with her, you must go back to the first time you met her in
Tobelbad, if you are ready to make that journey in time.
I am ready to make the journey.
let's go to Tobelbad.
go to Tobelbad!